if you like me you must not know who I am
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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