I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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