I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Randomize
