yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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