Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
