my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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