Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
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You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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