So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
