Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize