You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
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