Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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