ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
And then he peed in my hair
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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