I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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