I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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