Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
