I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
