woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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