My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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