i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize