Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
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it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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