Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
