the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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