careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
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