So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
a search helicopter?!
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize