i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Randomize
