I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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