My entire life is one complicated drinking game
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
