she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
