Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Shame - the story of my life.
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