Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
A+ Viking dick
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
