Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
