Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize
