dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
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