I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
