Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
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