That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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