We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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