Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
