For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
