Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
The beer is more important than you right now.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
