I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
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