I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
