No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize