I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
