super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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