She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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