you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
