The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
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