come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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