Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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