have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
