I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
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I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
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After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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