Fine. I'll sleep in my office
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
So squirting runs in the family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
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